Obama strides up to the podium and starts his address:
My fellow Americans.
As we all know the America is experiencing an economic downturn. Although not as serious as the great depression (although it may get that bad if the dollar collapses) the failing economy has affected a significant portion of the American population. I am here tonight to announce a major change in my economic philosophy and policy.
As you know I have no experience in the private sector. I have never held a ‘real’ job! I have never produced anything or contributed to economic system! I have never run a business, made a payroll or employed anyone. I have always worked in the ‘public’ or ‘not for profit sector’, thus, I have very little understanding of capitalism or the free enterprise system. I have always surrounded myself with Leftists, Socialists, Marxists, Communists and generally Anti-Capitalists…. but… today, I have seen the failure of their ways and the fallacy of these economic philosophies. Today, I am announcing a series of new economic policies to re-energize our free enterprise economic system.
Starting immediately I am asking Congress to make the following changes to our Tax System:
Reduce the maximum personal rate tax rate to a maximum of 10%.
Freeze government spending and limit Federal spending to collected tax receipts. I have determined tax cuts stimulate economic growth faster and more efficiently than any Government program. In addition, tax cuts actually increase Government receipts as a direct result of an expanding economy as proven by the Reagan and Bush tax cuts of the 1980’s and 2000’s… Tax rates were cut, thus, providing more capital for business investments and expansion and resulting increased tax receipts collected by the IRS and increase employment. The days of old, out of date Keynesian economic theory is over.
Freeze the $787 billion Stimulus Bill of 2009. It has failed to stimulate the economy. Government spending cannot stimulate the economy. You cannot spend your way out of a recession. In addition, the majority of the money appropriated doesn’t get spent until mid to late 2010 or just in time for the next congressional election and will have no positive effect on today’s economy.
I am announcing an immediate suspension of all payroll taxes and employer matching funds. Let the American people keep what they earn to feed and house their families, educate their children and invest their hard earned money in what they determine is right for them… not what the Government determines is best for its citizens.
An economic recovery cannot be sustained without job creation. Businesses today have cut employment down to muscle and bone. They have eliminated all the fat in their firms and operations. Frankly, many businesses have learned they can make money or at least survive during this downturn at significantly reduced employment levels. Expanding our economic system will create jobs and sustain an economic recovery. We must adopt incentives for small business since small business employs 80% of Americans and is the backbone of our economic system. We must in the future reduce the tax and regulation burden on small business to sustain any economic recovery.
My administration has created a $1.4 trillion dollar deficit this year alone. This sum is more than all the deficits accumulated from all Presidents and Administrations since the inception of our Country… all in just 10 months! This is unsustainable and basically immoral. It will rob our children of a sound economic future since our children will have to pay for our outrageous spending with exorbitant tax rates in the future.
This is just the first of many new policies my administration will adopt over the next few months in an all out effort to get our economy moving again, to get American’s back to work and help build a stronger American. A strong America contributes to a more stable world.
Over the next few weeks you can expect my administration to announce more new policies designed to stimulate our economy and help you create a better future for you and your family.
Thank you, good night and God bless America. BUZZ...BUZZ...BUZZ... the alarm is going off... it's time to wake-up. I roll over look at my lovely wife and say... "Boy... you won't believe the dream I just had!"
Wake-up American! It's time for the 2nd AMERICAN Revolution!
Sincerely,
The Flyover Conservative
